Following Alyssa’s “Crib” blog, Nicki was inspired to introduce everyone to the Bifengxia Bachelors.

“We’re over a third of the way through our internship now! Time flies when you get to watch pandas all day. Being at the base every day you really get to know each panda and their individual personality. Breeding season is well underway and the pandas are looking for love, so I decided to play wing woman and create dating profiles based on each panda’s unique personality (and way too much anthropomorphism) to help them find some suitable ladies. This week we have the Bifengxia Bachelors Wu Gang, Jin Ke, An An, Lu Lu, and Xiang Ge. Enjoy!

Wu Gang

Age: 16

Bio: Sup ladies. I’m a laid back kind of dude. Give me some bamboo and a comfy rock to lean on and I’m solid. Chicks dig this pink nose I’m rockin. I like a lady who can come over, eat bamboo, and just chill.

Jin Ke

Age: 6

Bio: What’s up! If you’re looking for a young, adventurous guy, look no further. Your man here is the life of the party. I’m a funny, charismatic guy and know how to make the girls laugh. I love going out for a drink with friends, yoga, and am currently training for a half marathon. Here you can see me limbering up (don’t want to pull a hammy). I’m looking for a lady who can have a good laugh and keep up with my active lifestyle.

An An

Age: 7

Bio: I’m a big guy with a lot of heart. Between my size and my sweet shoulder scar, I can come off as a tough guy, but really I’m a softie. If you’re interested I’d love to cook you a gourmet dinner of sautéed carrots and apples and watch Kung Fu Panda on my couch.

Lu Lu

Age: 16

Bio: I may be a bit older, but ladies I am open for business! They don’t call me the Playboy of Bifengxia for nothing. Breeding season is the best time of the year and I am pumped to meet all the fine ladies at the breeding center in 2016. My first few breedings this season haven’t gone as well as I hoped but I just need to get my mojo going and it’ll be back to LuLu the Ladykiller in no time!

Xiang Ge

Age: 8

Bio: Yo yo! I like to get my cardio in every morning running the barrier while checkin’ out the hot girls next door. My favorite celebrity is Matthew McConaughey because he taught me that if I take my shirt off I’ll get more chicks. When I’m not lifting or broin’ out with my boy Wu Gang, I like to chill in my crib and eat some carrots. Heads up, I can be pretty territorial about who gets to come to the bachelor pad so let a bro know if you’re bringing friends or we might have some problems.”

-Nicki